If I’d known it was the last time

I wouldn’t have spoken to you like that

Without even lining up my shoes at the door

I just turned my back and said, “See you later”

If I’d known it was the last time

I wouldn’t have brushed off those trivial, meaningless conversations

I would’ve paid attention, and burned every single one

of your laugh lines into my memory

If I’d known it was the last time,

I would’ve held you tight and never let go.

I would’ve realized that this ordinary day

was a miracle that would never come again.

If I’d known it was the last time,

I wouldn’t have rushed to say “I’m sorry.”

The words I couldn’t say

are still alive inside my heart.

If I’d known it was the last time,

I wouldn’t have sulked and asked,

“Don’t you want that last bite?”

I would’ve let you do as you pleased.

If I’d known it was the last time

I wouldn’t have looked at the clock

With the person most precious to me

Right in front of me, I didn’t realize it

If I’d known it was the last time

I would have held you tight and never let go

It was so ordinary

I couldn’t even see what was important

If I’d known it was the last time

I would have filled the air with “thank yous”

The words we never exchanged

Still swirl deep within my heart

Over and over again

I keep opening the door of regret

Searching for a different version of myself

In the timeline where you’re still alive

I feel like I could say it now:

“It’s because I knew it was the last time.”

Instead of “I love you,”

I send a prayer that came too late.

If I had known it was the last time,

I’m sure I would have repeated

the very same mistakes.

Because you would have remained yourself.

…続きを読む

最後だと分かっていたなら

あんな言い方しなかった

玄関の靴 揃えもせずに

「じゃあね」とだけ背中向けた

最後だと分かっていたなら

「どうでもいい」なんて他愛もない話

聞き流さずに 君の笑い皺ひとつひとつを

目に焼きつけた

最後だと分かっていたなら

抱きしめて離さなかった

ありふれた今日が二度とは来ない

奇跡だと

最後だと分かっていたなら

「ごめんね」を急いで言った

言えなかった言葉が胸の中で

まだ生きている

最後だと分かっていたなら

食卓に残った あの一口も

「いらないの？」なんて拗ねずに

君の好きなようにさせてあげた

最後だと分かっていたなら

時計なんか見なかった

誰よりも大事な人を目の前にして

気付けなかった

最後だと分かっていたなら

抱きしめて離さなかった

当たり前すぎて大切な事さえ

見えなくて

最後だと分かっていたなら

「ありがとう」で埋め尽くした

交わせなかった言葉が胸の奥で

今も渦巻く

何度も

何度も

後悔のドアを開け直しては

違う自分を探している

君が生きている

世界線を

最後だと分かっていたからと

今ならもう言える気がする

「愛してる」の代わりに

遅すぎた祈りを贈る

最後だと分かっていたなら

きっと同じ過ちさえ

繰り返してしまうだろう

君が君でいてくれた

はずだから