[Verse 1]
It started with a spilled pint, just a drop upon the floor,
But Paddy swore by all the gods he’d not be drinkin’ more!
"Ye clumsy fool!" I shouted, "That was meant to touch me lips!"
He swung his fist, I ducked and missed, and punched him in the ribs!

[Chorus]
Oh, swing lads, swing! The whiskey’s flowin’ free!
A broken mug, a busted nose, that’s how it's meant to be!
The fiddles play, the barstools fly, the landlord’s lost his mind,
And we’ll be back tomorrow night if we’re not all confined!

[Verse 2]
The barman grabbed a rolling pin and whacked me ‘cross the ear,
I tumbled through a table and landed in me beer!
Maggie threw a bottle, knocked O’Malley off his chair,
And someone hurled a sausage—don’t know how that got there!

[Chorus]
Oh, swing lads, swing! The whiskey’s flowin’ free!
A broken mug, a busted nose, that’s how it's meant to be!
The fiddles play, the barstools fly, the landlord’s lost his mind,
And we’ll be back tomorrow night if we’re not all confined!

[Bridge]
The law came in with clubs in hand, said, “Boys, now that’s enough!”
Then Murphy threw a cabbage head, and that just called their bluff!

[Final Chorus]
Oh, swing lads, swing! The whiskey’s flowin’ free!
A broken mug, a busted nose, that’s how it's meant to be!
The fiddles play, the barstools fly, the landlord’s lost his mind,
And we’ll be back tomorrow night if we’re not all confined!

[Outro]
“Who took me shoe?!”
“That was me pint, ye bastard!”
“Maggie, put the chair down!”