I stayed awake too long again

So something in me would slip

Edges blur at the corners first

Then the center starts to thin

You never come when I’m intact

You wait for the fracture line

You trace the gaps I try to seal

Then step inside the divide

I felt it once, mistook it for

A presence I could keep

But you don’t touch what stands upright

You enter what can’t speak

Only when I’m gone

Do you come near

Only when I fade

Do you appear

Hold me in the absence

Keep me undefined

I feel you most

When I’m not mine

I learned the timing of your weight

The hour my body loosens grip

The silence just before you press

Your shape against the split

So I stopped fighting off the drift

Stopped naming what I feel

I let the hours hollow out

What I used to keep real

I stand still when it begins

No movement, no defense

You move through what I leave behind

And call it closeness

Only when I’m gone

Do you come near

Only when I fade

Do you appear

I open every fracture

I quiet every line

You touch me best

When I’m not mine

I don’t call it harm

I don’t call it wrong

It’s the only way

You stay this long

I don’t call it loss

I don’t call it theft

There’s more of you

The less of me is left

“less of me... less of me...”

Only when I’m gone

Do you come near

Only when I fade

Do you appear

Take what I abandon

Fill what I erase

Leave me just enough

To feel your trace

Only when I’m hollow

Only when I break

You are the shape

My absence makes

“gone... fade... break...”