領主大人的老痰｜The Noble Phlegm of Our Lord
Taiwanese, Stoner Rock , Playful, Theatrical, Anthemic, Upbeat, Humorous Male vocals, Dramatic, Storytelling
麥客官(MicroGuan)·3:35
3:35
領主大人的老痰｜The Noble Phlegm of Our Lord
Taiwanese, Stoner Rock , Playful, Theatrical, Anthemic, Upbeat, Humorous Male vocals, Dramatic, Storytelling
Creator: 麥客官(MicroGuan)Release Date: February 18, 2025
Lyrics
【領主大人的老痰｜The Noble Phlegm of Our Lord】
【詞：麥客官 ｜Lyricist: MicroGuan】
【Youtube ver. - https://youtu.be/01vM35Gw8hs】
指揮官大喝提起嗓門 信心喊話如雷貫耳
來不及了 我在隊伍第一排開始懷疑人生
雙手發抖已分不清是害怕還是過於興奮
終於來到了關鍵時刻 全軍列陣鴉雀無聲
就是有人 突然出聲打破塑造已久的氣氛
立下FLAG 說什麼打完仗便要回鄉結婚
領主大人咳了一聲我們馬首是瞻
正要衝鋒之時他吐了一口老痰
不偏不倚的射在我臉上
我一時無法用手將它抹開 (啊!!!!!)
我本想奮不顧身 我本想衝鋒陷陣 但就是那口痰的餘溫 讓我越戰越分神
我本想血流成河 我本想諸神黃昏 但就是那口痰的溫存 讓我邊跑邊作噁
突然一個角度沒算準 嘴巴一張喉嚨一咳 我好想已把那老痰吞吞吞吞吞
下一秒睜開眼睛已在傷兵營躺著 領主大人出現在我眼前說辛苦了
勳章就這麼到手了!!!!
將來我若是有了子孫 問起我站在第一排是怎麼活下來的
我總不能說是那口老痰讓我絕境逢生 所以若是他們誰知道了
我就當作他沒出生 家裡從來沒這個人 (啊!!!!!)
我本想奮不顧身 我本想衝鋒陷陣 但就是那口痰的餘溫 讓我越戰越分神
我本想血流成河 我本想諸神黃昏 但就是那口痰的溫存 讓我邊跑邊作噁
突然一個角度沒算準 嘴巴一張喉嚨一咳 我好想已把那老痰吞吞吞吞吞
下一秒睜開眼睛已在傷兵營躺著 領主大人出現在我眼前說辛苦了
勳章就這麼到手了!!!!
(領主大人的老痰讓我死裡逃生 難聞的氣味富含壞死細胞的成分)
(領主大人的老痰讓我死裡逃生 濃稠的口感參雜細菌病毒的靈魂)
(領主大人的老痰讓我死裡逃生 難聞的氣味富含壞死細胞的成分)
(領主大人的老痰讓我死裡逃生 濃稠的口感參雜細菌病毒的靈魂)
==【English Translation of the Lyrics】==
The commander shouted loudly, his voice like thunder,
It was too late, I started to doubt my life in the front row,
My hands trembled, I couldn’t tell if it was fear or excitement.
Finally, the crucial moment came, the army stood in silence,
But someone suddenly spoke, breaking the carefully built atmosphere,
They set a flag, saying after the battle, they would return home to marry.
The noble lord coughed, we looked to him for guidance,
Just as we were about to charge, he spat out a piece of phlegm,
It landed perfectly on my face,
I couldn’t wipe it off with my hand for a moment (Ah!!!!).
I meant to throw myself recklessly, I meant to charge into the battle,
But that residual warmth of the phlegm made me more and more distracted,
I meant to see rivers flowing with blood, I meant to bring about Ragnarok,
But that warmth of the phlegm made me gag as I ran.
Suddenly, I miscalculated a corner, opened my mouth, coughed,
I really felt like I swallowed that old phlegm, gulping it down,
The next second, I opened my eyes and found myself lying in the infirmary,
The noble lord appeared in front of me, saying "Thank you for your hard work."
And the medal was mine!!!!
In the future, if I have descendants, and they ask how I survived standing in the front row,
I can’t just say it was the old phlegm that saved me from certain death,
So if they find out,
I’ll just pretend they were never born, as if they never existed (Ah!!!!).
I meant to throw myself recklessly, I meant to charge into the battle,
But that residual warmth of the phlegm made me more and more distracted,
I meant to see rivers flowing with blood, I meant to bring about Ragnarok,
But that warmth of the phlegm made me gag as I ran.
Suddenly, I miscalculated a corner, opened my mouth, coughed,
I really felt like I swallowed that old phlegm, gulping it down,
The next second, I opened my eyes and found myself lying in the infirmary,
The noble lord appeared in front of me, saying "Thank you for your hard work."
And the medal was mine!!!!
(The noble phlegm of our lord saved me from certain death, the unpleasant smell is filled with necrotic cells.)
(The noble phlegm of our lord saved me from certain death, the thick texture is mixed with the soul of bacteria and viruses.)
(The noble phlegm of our lord saved me from certain death, the unpleasant smell is filled with necrotic cells.)
(The noble phlegm of our lord saved me from certain death, the thick texture is mixed with the soul of bacteria and viruses.)
===後記/Afterword===
最近的假日，我都在享受《天國降臨：救贖2》所帶來的沉浸式遊戲體驗。主角亨利總是奮戰在戰場的最前線，白天四處奔波做跑腿，晚上則依靠竊盜致富，完美詮釋了「人在江湖，身不由己」的生存之道。每當遊戲中出現戰爭場景，我總會不禁想到網路社群經常討論的一個問題──「在戰爭中，站在第一排的士兵究竟在想什麼？」這個問題，透過簡單搜尋就能找到各種見解，因此我不再多談，而是想延伸出一個新的思考點：戰場上風沙漫天，萬一不小心吃到風沙，我們該怎麼辦？當然是吐掉！這是再自然不過的反應，甚至就連貴為領主大人，也難免會吃到風沙，並且可能夾帶著老痰一同吐出。本來這並不值得大驚小怪，但如果這口痰不小心吐到了小兵身上，會怎麼樣呢？基於這個靈感，我創作了這首歌，希望大家會喜歡！
During my recent weekends, I’ve been enjoying the immersive experience of Kingdom Come: Deliverance II. The protagonist, Henry, is always on the front lines, running errands during the day and turning to theft to get rich by night—truly embodying the survival saying, "When you’re in the world, you can’t control your own fate."
Whenever there’s a war scene in the game, I can’t help but think about a question often discussed in online communities: "What are the soldiers standing in the front line during war really thinking?" This question has many answers out there if you search for it, so I won’t go into it too much. Instead, I’d like to extend that thinking with a new idea:
On the battlefield, with sand and dust flying everywhere, what should you do if you accidentally swallow some of it? Of course, you spit it out! It’s only natural. Even a noble lord can’t avoid inhaling dust, and might end up spitting it out along with some phlegm. Normally, this wouldn’t be a big deal, but what happens if that spit lands on a soldier?
Inspired by this thought, I wrote this song and hope you’ll enjoy it!
【詞：麥客官 ｜Lyricist: MicroGuan】
【Youtube ver. - https://youtu.be/01vM35Gw8hs】
指揮官大喝提起嗓門 信心喊話如雷貫耳
來不及了 我在隊伍第一排開始懷疑人生
雙手發抖已分不清是害怕還是過於興奮
終於來到了關鍵時刻 全軍列陣鴉雀無聲
就是有人 突然出聲打破塑造已久的氣氛
立下FLAG 說什麼打完仗便要回鄉結婚
領主大人咳了一聲我們馬首是瞻
正要衝鋒之時他吐了一口老痰
不偏不倚的射在我臉上
我一時無法用手將它抹開 (啊!!!!!)
我本想奮不顧身 我本想衝鋒陷陣 但就是那口痰的餘溫 讓我越戰越分神
我本想血流成河 我本想諸神黃昏 但就是那口痰的溫存 讓我邊跑邊作噁
突然一個角度沒算準 嘴巴一張喉嚨一咳 我好想已把那老痰吞吞吞吞吞
下一秒睜開眼睛已在傷兵營躺著 領主大人出現在我眼前說辛苦了
勳章就這麼到手了!!!!
將來我若是有了子孫 問起我站在第一排是怎麼活下來的
我總不能說是那口老痰讓我絕境逢生 所以若是他們誰知道了
我就當作他沒出生 家裡從來沒這個人 (啊!!!!!)
我本想奮不顧身 我本想衝鋒陷陣 但就是那口痰的餘溫 讓我越戰越分神
我本想血流成河 我本想諸神黃昏 但就是那口痰的溫存 讓我邊跑邊作噁
突然一個角度沒算準 嘴巴一張喉嚨一咳 我好想已把那老痰吞吞吞吞吞
下一秒睜開眼睛已在傷兵營躺著 領主大人出現在我眼前說辛苦了
勳章就這麼到手了!!!!
(領主大人的老痰讓我死裡逃生 難聞的氣味富含壞死細胞的成分)
(領主大人的老痰讓我死裡逃生 濃稠的口感參雜細菌病毒的靈魂)
(領主大人的老痰讓我死裡逃生 難聞的氣味富含壞死細胞的成分)
(領主大人的老痰讓我死裡逃生 濃稠的口感參雜細菌病毒的靈魂)
==【English Translation of the Lyrics】==
The commander shouted loudly, his voice like thunder,
It was too late, I started to doubt my life in the front row,
My hands trembled, I couldn’t tell if it was fear or excitement.
Finally, the crucial moment came, the army stood in silence,
But someone suddenly spoke, breaking the carefully built atmosphere,
They set a flag, saying after the battle, they would return home to marry.
The noble lord coughed, we looked to him for guidance,
Just as we were about to charge, he spat out a piece of phlegm,
It landed perfectly on my face,
I couldn’t wipe it off with my hand for a moment (Ah!!!!).
I meant to throw myself recklessly, I meant to charge into the battle,
But that residual warmth of the phlegm made me more and more distracted,
I meant to see rivers flowing with blood, I meant to bring about Ragnarok,
But that warmth of the phlegm made me gag as I ran.
Suddenly, I miscalculated a corner, opened my mouth, coughed,
I really felt like I swallowed that old phlegm, gulping it down,
The next second, I opened my eyes and found myself lying in the infirmary,
The noble lord appeared in front of me, saying "Thank you for your hard work."
And the medal was mine!!!!
In the future, if I have descendants, and they ask how I survived standing in the front row,
I can’t just say it was the old phlegm that saved me from certain death,
So if they find out,
I’ll just pretend they were never born, as if they never existed (Ah!!!!).
I meant to throw myself recklessly, I meant to charge into the battle,
But that residual warmth of the phlegm made me more and more distracted,
I meant to see rivers flowing with blood, I meant to bring about Ragnarok,
But that warmth of the phlegm made me gag as I ran.
Suddenly, I miscalculated a corner, opened my mouth, coughed,
I really felt like I swallowed that old phlegm, gulping it down,
The next second, I opened my eyes and found myself lying in the infirmary,
The noble lord appeared in front of me, saying "Thank you for your hard work."
And the medal was mine!!!!
(The noble phlegm of our lord saved me from certain death, the unpleasant smell is filled with necrotic cells.)
(The noble phlegm of our lord saved me from certain death, the thick texture is mixed with the soul of bacteria and viruses.)
(The noble phlegm of our lord saved me from certain death, the unpleasant smell is filled with necrotic cells.)
(The noble phlegm of our lord saved me from certain death, the thick texture is mixed with the soul of bacteria and viruses.)
===後記/Afterword===
最近的假日，我都在享受《天國降臨：救贖2》所帶來的沉浸式遊戲體驗。主角亨利總是奮戰在戰場的最前線，白天四處奔波做跑腿，晚上則依靠竊盜致富，完美詮釋了「人在江湖，身不由己」的生存之道。每當遊戲中出現戰爭場景，我總會不禁想到網路社群經常討論的一個問題──「在戰爭中，站在第一排的士兵究竟在想什麼？」這個問題，透過簡單搜尋就能找到各種見解，因此我不再多談，而是想延伸出一個新的思考點：戰場上風沙漫天，萬一不小心吃到風沙，我們該怎麼辦？當然是吐掉！這是再自然不過的反應，甚至就連貴為領主大人，也難免會吃到風沙，並且可能夾帶著老痰一同吐出。本來這並不值得大驚小怪，但如果這口痰不小心吐到了小兵身上，會怎麼樣呢？基於這個靈感，我創作了這首歌，希望大家會喜歡！
During my recent weekends, I’ve been enjoying the immersive experience of Kingdom Come: Deliverance II. The protagonist, Henry, is always on the front lines, running errands during the day and turning to theft to get rich by night—truly embodying the survival saying, "When you’re in the world, you can’t control your own fate."
Whenever there’s a war scene in the game, I can’t help but think about a question often discussed in online communities: "What are the soldiers standing in the front line during war really thinking?" This question has many answers out there if you search for it, so I won’t go into it too much. Instead, I’d like to extend that thinking with a new idea:
On the battlefield, with sand and dust flying everywhere, what should you do if you accidentally swallow some of it? Of course, you spit it out! It’s only natural. Even a noble lord can’t avoid inhaling dust, and might end up spitting it out along with some phlegm. Normally, this wouldn’t be a big deal, but what happens if that spit lands on a soldier?
Inspired by this thought, I wrote this song and hope you’ll enjoy it!