Woke up this morning, catnip crave gone berserk

Brain's a mushy puddle, sloshed in feline murk

Might grind a granny's bones, or stomp a toddler's skull

For that leafy devil, yeah, my sanity's null

You wouldn't grasp it, fool, life's a grotesque farce

Catnip's chomped my cortex, left me in the dark

Snort it up my nostrils, till my eyeballs pop

Cats know better, they whisper, never stop

Cats know better

Cats know better

Cats know better

Nibblin' neurons, furry apocalypse

Pummel a hobo's guts, or slurp a sewer rat

You can't comprehend, my fate's a splattered mat

My junk's microscopic, bugs throw pity parties

Hidin' knives in my colon, for those bloody sorties

Schooled to smash the feeble, crunch their brittle spines

That's my rotten rhythm, crossin' all the lines

Destiny's a vomit comet, hurlin' me insane

Cats know better, catnip's feasted on my brain

Cats know better

Cats know better

Cats know better

Gnawin' grey matter, whisker wasteland

If you're limbless, eyeless, just a quivering blob

For catnip, I'll puree ya, turn ya into slob

Perhaps you're mute and mangled, my perfect prey delight

Creep in with a blender, blend ya out of sight

I'm the mangy monarch, prowlin' putrid alleys

Dole out maggots as treats, ignite the grosser tallies

Crush a slug with glee, or chug a pus-filled cup

I'm the vile overlord, your world's all chewed up

You wouldn't fathom, fool, my realm's a rancid dream

Catnip's gobbled grey cells, burstin' at the seam

Claws in the air, in this nightmare charade

Cats know better, my mind's forever decayed

Cats know better

Cats know better

Cats know better

Meowin' meltdown, brainless brigade